Turning the wheel…

…..when the blue water plays with the shore to tell something…..

Archive for the ‘Feminism’ Category

Tab Chuppi Todo…

Posted by Rewa Smriti on May 5, 2017

Dear All,

I feel being silent sometimes is the best possible solution or say golden practice at times when an argument is going nowhere. But there are so many women who are suffering in silence. Please understand that remaining silent is not at all a solution of suffering.

I am posting a poem which is written by one of my loving junior Shweta from JNV Katihar, Bihar. The title of her poem “Chuppi Todo” encourages women to raise your voice against the violence.

Posted in As a Woman, Feminism, Society, Video Clips | Tagged: | 6 Comments »

रेवा की धारा…!

Posted by Rewa Smriti on April 22, 2017

I am so lucky and thankful for my best friend Ruchi, who reminded me of writing a poem. I actually forgot that “main likhti bhi hun!?” 😉 She is not only a friend but I am fortunate enough to have her as family. Ruchi, I can’t express how much it means to me to have you in my life.

I haven’t written for a long time so it’s difficult for me to recall my own poem. I am truly blessed with the friends I have in my life. You are an invisible force in my poems.  I wrote this poetry to bring me back to my own tune. 🙂

कुछ को,
किसीके होने का भय
कुछ को,
किसीके ना होने की चाह
इस होने, ना होने के दरमियाँ
बांधों के बंधन को तोड़
अखंड प्रवहिनी,
आती-जाती तूफानों में
लहर की झड़ियाँ लहराती
एकांत में,
कल – कल, छल – छल
अविचल बहती
चल पड़ी वो अपनी राह
सच की बुनियाद गढ़ने!
किंतु अपरिचित इससे
लोभ के थोक व्यापारी
रोक ना पाए रेवा की धारा!

****************

written on: 20.04.2017

Posted in As a Woman, Family n Friends, Feminism, Love n Life, Own Hindi Poems, Relationships | 22 Comments »

Feeling of…

Posted by Rewa Smriti on March 29, 2014

तस्वीर तेरे दिल की कुछ बोलती नही किसीसे!
फिर किसी की नज़र क्यूँ टिकी पड़ी है तुझपे!!

वो गिर गये हैं अपनी नज़र से, तुझे गिराने में!
झुक गयी है नज़र उनकी, तेरी ज़िंदगी आज़माने में!! 🙂

Posted in As a Woman, Family n Friends, Feminism, Own Hindi Poems | 3 Comments »

Brutality lies in the eyes of men!!!

Posted by Rewa Smriti on December 19, 2012

Why women feel guilty and men just don’t care… That is ironical!

In every corner of India, it is absolute jokers who represent our society of onlookers.

Yes, we are a nation of onlookers. We talk big and make revolutionary statements “Enough is enough” but we never take action when it actually is required. We like to talk as it does not cost us anything, but we forget that somebody is paying a hard cost with life and dignity even without doing anything. Nobody thinks about the rape victims, what they go through when they are raped and what impact would be there on their lives after it. We conveniently show our middle finger and go on with true hibernation.  Aren’t we in real sense a nation of onlookers?

Why every time women are blamed of everything, be it clothes or behavior? Why don’t people look at the good values instilled in men, which make them worse than animals. Which society says that clothing controls values so much that a crime like rape becomes right? There is nothing wrong in the clothes that women choose to wear. As it is said – “Beauty lies in the eyes of beholder”, the same way- “Brutality also lies in the eyes of men, which just needs a prey to pounce on!

A tiger never hunts down a tiger, but a deer, which is considerably weak. There is no justification to the statement that women should change themselves or their sense of dressing, even if they do so, in no way it justifies that kids in the age group 2-5 years are also raped whereas nothing is being done to stop the rapist and change the values which says that we cannot change men’s temperament. For a proof of men’s brutality, do see the attached video.

Posted in As a Woman, Feminism, Men n Women, Society, Thoughts, Video Clips | 17 Comments »

An Awakening Call…!

Posted by Rewa Smriti on May 23, 2012

The song is very touching, it makes you feel the pain of women and at the same time it gives women an encouragement and immense valor to face the world. As Shakespeare once said, “the better part of valor is discretion”.  Below is the Rupaiya song from the show Satyamev Jayate, along with the complete lyrics.

Babul pyare sajan sakha re
Suno meri maiyya
Bojh nahi main kisi ke sar ka
Naa majdhar mein naiyya
Patwar banoongi, leharon se ladungi
Arey mujhe kya bechega rupaiya
Ho arey mujhe kya bechega rupaiya

Kal baba ki ungli thaame chali thi
Kal baba ki lathi bhi bann jaaungi
Amma tere gharonde ki chidiya hoon main
Dana lekar hi ghar wapas aaungi

Jiski fitrat mein ghairat samaayi nahi
Jisko daulat se jyada main bhaayi nahi
Aise shaadi ki mujhko zaroorat nahi
Naa kehne ka sunlo muhurat yahi
Akeli chalungi, Kismat se milungi
Arey mujhe kya bechega rupaiya
Ho arey mujhe kya bechega rupaiya
Ho ho ho..
Dil se dil ke taar toh jude nahi
Do rasmon pe daulat ye kaahe bahe
Hum toh pyaar ki khwahish mein rishte bune
Do rishton mein lalach hum kaahe sahe
Kya shaadi ke aage zindagi hi nahi
Jo shaadi hisaabo ki keval hai
Aise saajan ki mujhko zaroorat nahi
Naa kehne ka sunlo muhurat yahi

Subahon si khilungi, Ratiya si bharungi
Arey mujhe kya bechega rupaiya
Ho arey mujhe kya bechega rupaiya
Ho ho ho…

No man is rich enough to buy your free will and dignity. This show is indeed an eye opener for those who in spite of having eyes, do not want to use them and are still struggling to accept the immenseness of women. For centuries, enough time is taken to think of the change, now it is the time to take action and implement it, till it becomes too late.

“Time enough to think of the future when you haven’t any future to think of” ~ George Barnard Shaw

Posted in As a Woman, Feminism, India n Me, Men n Women, Nation Building, Society, Video Clips | Tagged: , | 5 Comments »

The woman…!

Posted by Rewa Smriti on November 20, 2011

This is a guest post sent by Satish, who also belongs to navodaya family. It’s always nice to read a post on women by sensible men!

“God must have made men before women, Its always a drought piece made before the master piece”

Few days ago we celebrated “international women’s week” and finally a 33% reservation is given to women, I am writing this blog neither for my concern with international women’s day nor for reservation success. But for the God’s wonderful creation on earth “THE Woman”.There is another name of women which we know but we still behave as if we don’t know, well I call the other name of women as Love, Sacrifice, Patience, Support, Success, Zeal, inspiration, Care, Kindness, in a word if I say its mere Perfection creature on earth. I know when I say these things my men friends and few girls will probably oppose my notion towards women, but I said these because I enjoyed all these feelings as and when I come across women in my life time till date….. So what’s the necessary to write about women now? It’s too necessary to enlighten many people about the role women plays in each ones life. I have seen a very arrogant attitude towards women from most of men whom I came across my life. Why always women looked in a lower standard than men?? Are we really educated??

A woman is a blessing to this earth. If we consider her significance into the life we would be mesmerized by the versatile characters she plays. She is a daughter, a sister, a wife, a mother, a friend and genuinely a real motivator, an inspiration and strength. A woman is a giver. In every role she plays she is always ready to give. As a daughter she is faithful to her parents and tries to put her parent’s faith o the top of her priorities. As a wife she is just a true devotee of her husband and at every step she helps her husband, supports him and encourages him to work hard. The most beautiful shade of a woman that everybody praises is the woman as a mother. A mother is a backbone for every family and every child. I still remember how my mother supported me in all my failures. How she enjoyed in my success. How much she scarified for me.

When there were 4 sweet pieces and we were 5 my mom was the first one to tell that she don’t like sweets at all.

In every problem we all unknowingly remember our mothers. Mother is a person, who pampers, solicitude, loves, gives, corrects, motivates and helps us without any expectations. I am having very best friend who is a girl, who was behind my failures, who was real motivator, who cried during my bad days, who enjoyed my success, who showered me love and affection, who cared me when I was not feeling well. Women are always great!

I even still agree there is proverb called “Behind every men there is a woman”.

Well, this sentence is more than enough to flatten a woman, well they never tried to go beyond the actual meaning of that sentence, I am sure this sentence might have probably done by a man, there is nothing much to be happy when you hear this sentence;

It says you always be behind a man, never try to go before him, you just support him, make him comfort, help him in his success but you be always behind him!!!!!!!!

India is a society where the male is greatly revered. Therefore women, especially the young girls, get very little respect and standing in this country. Starting from birth, girls do not receive as much care and commitment from their parents and society as a boy would. Only about 39 percent of all women in India actually attend primary schools. There are several reasons why families choose not to educate their daughters. One reason is that parents get nothing in return for educating their daughters. Another reason is that all the females in a household have the responsibility of the housework. So even though education does not financially burden the family, it costs them the time she spends at school when she could be doing chores.

India is a male-dominated country and here women have always been a part of harassment and domination. But still after all the hurdles in their way they have come up with a lighting and bright power in today’s scenario. Women are the powerful entities and they are always being a brave fighter in the battle of life. Women have proved that they are no longer at loss in any of the fields and they are versatile. They do not expect too much in return. Women want just love, respect and care and we can shower the whole life for our loved ones and for our society. It is not just we women want it this way but any human being needs love and respect. Women are indispensible for this earth and for each and every society and family. If god has sent two entities on the world (man and woman) then he must have thought about their uniqueness. No one is complete without the other. Only men alone cannot run this world they need the women at every step of life.  So still you planning for a dowry? Do you still don’t need a baby girl? do you still see women in lower standards ? Do you still dis-respect her?? think on before you comment on some girl !!

“The man who doesn’t respect a woman in his life will never love/respect his mother and his wife”

Posted in Discuss, Feminism, Guest Posts, Men n Women, Society | Tagged: | 48 Comments »

Emotions are one of our avenues to self-understanding!

Posted by Rewa Smriti on October 12, 2011

Recently, I came across a person who passed the statement as quoted;

A person, who understands the whole society as his family and accepts everybody with one eye, ‘has higher sense of emotion’.

The above little statement raises so many questions, psychological questions, philosophical questions, and existential questions even. First and foremost, I would like to ask such person that ‘Do you really understand yourself‘?

A person, who claims to understand a society, may not be a person who really understands the society. In order to understand the society, first it is necessary to understand an individual who is the basic unit, from which the society is built. A person, who doesn’t understand an individual, is it right for him/her to claim that he/she can understand the entire society?

John D. (Jack) Mayer says, “Emotions operate on many levels.  They have a physical aspect as well as a psychological aspect.  Emotions bridge thought, feeling, and action – they operate in every part of a person, they affect many aspects of a person, and the person affects many aspects of the emotions.” I do believe that emotions do not define us, they are a form of inner communication that help us to understand ourselves. “Emotions control our thinking, behavior and actions”!

However, it has left me thinking that a person who doesn’t understand an individual’s emotions, how can be expected from him/her to unravel the entire wave of the society’s sentiments, if he/she is not able to hold on to ‘a single thread of emotion! It is ‘the emotion’ that play a vital role in our lives, and even more so in self improvement, and with emotion, our true power of intention will shine all the way through. Most important, “Emotions are one of our avenues to self-understanding!

I have experienced that mostly such people who claim such thing, on the contrary, have an absolute absence or an unacceptable low degree of emotional quotient!  Some of them also go to the extent of claiming that they are people who perceive the whole society as their family and accept everybody with one eye. I believe, they need to open second eye as well and see themselves more clearly.

Likewise, there are a bunch of intellectuals, so called progressive thinkers who claim to be a Gandhian or yet Gandhi him/herself of the modern era – just by wearing khadi or holding on to a notion that they are Ghandiji re-incarnated. Eh, just can’t see the Gandhi yet! Gandhi perceived wearing white khadi cloths as a sign of peace, love, self esteem and over all, a sense of respect. But does that mean anybody donning a khadi kurta could represent Gandhian ideology?

Furthermore, unfortunately, there is duality in what they think and what they do – rather a mismatch in what they perceive and what they act. Their often repeated mantra is “vashudhaiv kutumbakam” (The whole world is a family), which in actuality becomes nothing but a laughable joke of the life for them.  They ‘do not practice what they preach’. They talk about peace while pointing the gun at others. Such people are dangerous- quite normal from outside, but confused from within. And, these complicated double-faced people may “rub you the wrong way“. I call them “hypocrites”! And moreover, a person cannot escape the label of “hypocrite” by saying he or she is only offering a suggestion to other people. And above all, such hypocrites are not fit to call themselves civilized; they may be from any parts of India or world, I don’t care. Nevertheless, their confined thinking & filthy mind reminds me Agyeyji’s poem which I read in school text book (cbse). I am quoting below as it might fit well here.

साँप !
तुम सभ्य तो हुए नहीं
नगर में बसना
भी तुम्हें नहीं आया।

एक बात पूछूँ–(उत्तर दोगे?)
तब कैसे सीखा डँसना–
विष कहाँ पाया?
~अज्ञेय

Now, the question is – Are they really able to understand the whole society- its composition, intricacies, human bonds??

Absolutely not! One needs to open both the eyes to understand whole society.  I know, nothing can prevent anyone from claiming what he or she is claiming. It’s a free world and anybody can interpret anything they like. Yet, it’s far from easy to understand such people who live their whole lives in a largely illusory world of unquestioned assumptions. I must emphasize that claims are useless until shaped by ‘good intentions’ and followed by equally ‘good actions’!

Excuse me! I repeat, please don’t ever try to impose your fundamental thoughts, rigid expectations and beliefs on others!

Posted in As a Woman, Feminism, Men n Women, Society, Thoughts | Tagged: | 38 Comments »

Heights of illiteracy in Kerala!

Posted by Rewa Smriti on August 3, 2011

Truth is often hard to digest goes the saying but I experienced this yesterday. I would like to share what I came to know from my friend.

Kerala is often referred as Gods country for its serene atmosphere but there is a place in Kerala called Thirunelli where there are more number of unmarried girls are with kids. Most of the children don’t know who the father is, and even if they know their fathers kills them anytime and roam free after that, because laws are not so strict there.

The main reason is unemployment, ignorance, illiteracy and the society there, due to which girls are forced to do this. There are certain communities which allow the girls to stay with the guys a week before the wedding. The innocent poor uneducated girls fall into this trap and at times they do this for good food and attractive clothes as well. It’s easy to get girls in these places and guess what?….These poor girls, however, sell themselves for simple reasons like sweet words, perfumes and what not!!! May be anything simpler than thats possible as well.

Girls ditched by outsiders are disowned by their own families. Medical facilities are so poor that even to get the baby aborted, they reach out to local physicians who mix small glass powder with medicines to kill the foetus but many a times it kills the mother as well! Guys don’t go to the same girl once they become pregnant and go for the next girl…so the new generation which doesn’t even know the father, has turned into a violent bunch and girls who are forced into prostitution for a living after the mess indulge into drinking and smoking for simple please.

I was shocked to learn that it happens in Kerala! The worst thing is literacy rate is 100% in Kerala and these girls are illiterates. I am sure, most of the people are not aware of this fact. It is a shame for us that these unmarried women continue to live in this state of poverty and neglect, that too in a high-literacy state like Kerala in 21st century.

Unfortunately, all this is happening in gods own country and God alone knows as what is happening in his country!  The govt. has just pitched in along with social reformers like Lakshami kutty but it will years together till gods own country will be HIS OWN!!!

Posted in As a Woman, Feminism, India n Me, Men n Women, Society, Value Education | 17 Comments »

बोल कि लब आज़ाद हैं तेरे!

Posted by Rewa Smriti on August 15, 2010

स्वतंत्रता दिवस की बधाई देने सुबह उठकर सर्वप्रथम माँ को फोन लगायी. यहाँ मौसम काफ़ी अच्छा है, हल्की – हल्की बारिश हो रही है. जैसे मानो अपनी स्वतंत्रता का जशन ये घूमड़ते बादल बरस कर मना रहे हैं. हल्की फुहारों का आनंद लेने कमरे से बाहर निकली. अनायास बादलों को घिरते देख दिल ने सोचा चलो कुछ लिखा जाए.

अभी हाल में कुछ हिन्दी ब्लॉग्स पढ़ी. कुछ बातें सोचने पर मज़बूर कर दिया और दिमाग़ में कई सवाल भी छोड़ गया. कोई भी पुरुष बिना सोचे समझे स्त्रियों के मामले में अपनी राय क्यूँ देने लगे हैं? कुछ लोगों को किसी स्त्री के स्वतंत्रता से क्यों इतनी परेशानी हो रही है? सदियों से गाय और बकरी समझी गयी नारियों से पुरुषों को डर क्यों लग रहा है? सवाल कितना ही जटिल हो किंतु कुछ सवालों का जवाब अपने अंतर्मन में झाँकने से ज़रूर मिलता है. स्पष्टवादी हूँ, इसलिए स्पष्ट लिखना एवं स्पष्ट रूप में अपने विचारों को रखना पसन्द है. अगर किसी को इससे भी शिकायत है तो माफी नही माँगूंगी क्योंकि स्वतंत्रता दिवस यही कह रहा है कि, बोल कि लब आज़ाद है तेरे!

मुझे ऐसा लगता है कि पुरुषों को परेशानी नारियों की स्वतंत्रता एवं खुले वातावरण में अपने खुले मनोवृति के होने से है. इससे भी ज़्यादा भय उन्हें आत्मविश्‍वासी नारी के अस्तित्व से है. पृथ्वी का अस्तित्व स्त्रियों के अस्तित्व से जुड़ा है. अब जब नारियों ने अपनी अस्तित्व की पहचान करने लगी हैं, और इस पहचान से मिल रही आत्मशक्ति से सिर्फ़ पुरुषों को ही नही बल्कि कुछ रूढ़िवादी औरतों को भी डर है! समाज के ऐसे पुरुष वर्ग उन नारियों के सन्दर्भ में अशलील एवं अपशब्दों का इस्तेमाल तथा उनकी स्वतंत्रता एवं संस्कार पर सवाल करते हैं. ऐसा कर वे कुछ पल के लिए अपनी झूठी एवं बेबुनियाद अहं को संतुष्टि देते हैं, जिसकी हर जगह भर्त्सना ही होती है.

नारी स्वतंत्र है और किसी को भी उसके स्वतंत्रता से शिकायत या परेशानी है तो वो उसकी  समस्या है. ऐसे लोगों को अपने उपर काम करना अति आवश्यक है, ताकि वे खुद के दबे एवं संकुचित विचारों को विस्तार दे सके. समय ने अपनी चाल बदल दी है और अब एक ही नदी का पानी शेर के साथ बकरियाँ भी पीने लगी हैं. ये अलग बात है कि शेर को बकरियों की यह स्वभाव अवश्य ही बर्दास्त नही हो रहा है. वर्तमान समय की माँग यही कहता है कि ‘शेर-ए-हिंद’ तुम्हे बदलना होगा, वरना आत्मस्वाभिमानी बकरियों के अस्तित्व से तुम्हे हर पल ख़तरा है!

Posted in As a Woman, Feminism, Men n Women, Society, Thoughts | 31 Comments »

Right to choose in the first place!

Posted by Rewa Smriti on September 27, 2009

Yesterday I was talking to one of my juniors on phone and her mood was totally off. She had a fight with her colleagues. While talking to her, I realized that she had got hurt. She was very much angry and when I inquired her, she said,

“pata nahi ye ladke log khud ko kya samajhte hein. I don’t know why they take only themselves to be talented”. One of her colleagues said that “girls ko to aise hi select kar lete hein, tujhe padhne ki jarurat kya hai? Aise hi shakl dekhkar number or promotion mil jayegi. Waise bhi shadi ke baad to ghar hi sambhalna hai. Promotion ki tension chod aur homemaker banne ki taiyari karo. You will not have any other choice because you are a woman!”

Hmmm… first of all why should it be shameful to admit that we are homemakers? Why can’t we simply say, “Yes, I am a homemaker”. No qualifiers, no need to prove ourselves and no feelings of guilt. Instead, one needs to respond with a silent smile and see the great joy of accomplishment shrouded in that word, “homemaker”!

Actually, her embarrassment is not being called a homemaker. Rather in being told that she is “fated” to be a homemaker. The role of a mother in shaping the life of man cannot be omitted. No way. But, a woman needs to have the choice to play a bigger role in the society. The choices are not only made for a man. And its not so that a man only has the right to lead his life his own way. I too have a number of friends who say, “I don’t want my wife to work, so she doesn’t work.” That’s fine! But, the question is if a guy has the right to take his own decision then why can’t a girl? Do the guys only know how, when and what decisions are to be taken?

Women are well known for multitasking, then why can’t they take decisions? Why should a woman totally depend on somebody? Please don’t say that a woman doesn’t know better or doesn’t have the capability. I simply can’t accept it! I believe, no one is either fully dependent, or fully independent. We are rather interdependent. So how can a man expect that woman should fully depend on him? If a woman can run a country just as well as she can run a home, what sense does it make to deny her right of choice?

People use to say, “It’s so easy. Just make the right choice! It’s not a tough job!” Well, let me say that right now, it is a tough job for women. It is very tough to make the right choices even when everything seems to be going perfectly fine because our society has yet to give the right to choose to everybody. People don’t only need to upgrade their current systems but they do need to upgrade their mindset too!

We need a society where women are given the right to choose, in the first place. I don’t say that just given the right to choose, we will have a civilized society. The right to choose may be misued too, as we see with the lifestyle of women caught up in the trends of consumerism, vanity and page-3 culture. This is certainly not desirable. And the same holds true for a man. But denied the right to choose will not let a good society to emerge either.

Men and women can work together in all dimensions of life, and help each other to make this earth a better place to live in.

Men may feel worried at this today, but in the long run they will feel proud of us! 🙂

Posted in As a Woman, Feminism, Men n Women, Society, Thoughts | 16 Comments »

 
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